You All Suck (Example #29, Holiday Edition)

"Censorship is telling a man he cannot have a steak just because a baby can't chew it." -- Mark Twain

The Year-End Review...

"This is dedicated to the thousands of brave and loyal Stormtroopers who gave their lives in the defense of the galaxy against the pernicious poison of stupidity. We must persevere and remember: in The Great Galactic War Against Retard, there will, unfortunately, be casualties. I just wish someone would finally design a Death Star that doesn't have the same fucking weakness. I mean, COME ON. It's not like this is complicated, guys. You've had like fifty examples, already. Even the Chinese Overlord  figured it out and his Minions are building Death Stars with no exhaust ports, and out of something better than plastic. For lower wages, too. And why can't our vehicles have wheels? Why legs, Dumbass?" -- The Overlord.

When Reality Ends and Fiction Begins...

"Life is infinitely stranger than anything which the mind of Man could invent. We would not dare to conceive the things which are mere commonplaces of existence. If we could fly out that window, hand in hand, hover over this great city, gently remove the roofs, and peep in on the queer things that are going on, the strange coincidences, the plannings, the cross-purposes, the wonderful chains of events, working through generations, and leading to the most outre results, it would make all fiction with it's conventionalities and foreseen conclusions most stale and unprofitable." -- Arthur Conan Doyle

Another Day, Another Idiot...

"I'm in a business where no one cares about anything except how well your last collection sold." - Calvin Klein

Making Spirits Bright...

"Christmas is a necessity. There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we're here for something else besides ourselves." -- Eric Severeid

A Majority Of One: "Be Careful What You Ask For...".

"The safest road to Hell is the gradual one - the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts." -- C.S. Lewis

Minor Shitstorms of Stupid...

"Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of our society. If we're looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn't test people for drugs; we should test people for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power." -- P.J. O'Rourke

Turkey, Suicide and Snot...

"(A Holiday) is a restoring thing, which, by a blast of magic turns Man into himself." -- G.K. Chesterton

"Thanksgiving dinners take 18 hours to prepare. They are consumed in twelve minutes. Half-times take twelve minutes. This is not a coincidence." -- Erma Bombeck.

The Politics of Penis...When "Hell ,Yeah!" Still Means "No"...

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.

T'was a Profession, Once...

The picture to the left is of an IBM 3090 Mainframe computing complex. This was "state of the art" in computing circles in 1985, and took up about as much floor space as would a tractor trailer.

It might even have weighed as much, as well.

You All Suck (Example #28 - "It Sucks to be Me" Edition)

" I prefer to be true to myself, even at the hazard of incurring the ridicule of others, rather than to be false, and incur my own abhorrence." -- Fredrick Douglas.

Erection 2018...

"Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American Public.." -- H.L. Mencken

A Tale of Two Morons...

"Violence is the last refuge of the incompetent." - Issac Asimov

Bombs, Bombast and Boobs...

"Death is the solution to all problems. No Man - no problem." -- Josef Stalin

Conspiracy Theory: Because Stupid People Need a Hobby, Too...

"The main thing I learned about Conspiracy Theory is that conspiracy theorists believe in a conspiracy because that is more comforting. The truth of the world is that it is often chaotic. The Truth is that it is not the Illuminati, The Jewish Banking Conspiracy, or the Gray Alien Conspiracy. The Truth is far more frightening -- no one is in control. The World is rudderless." -- Philip Moore

"...if you assume a big enough conspiracy, you can explain everything. Including the cosmos, itself." -- Fritz Leiber

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 10/20/18 - Governor Andrew Cuomo)

"We see many instances of cities going down like sinking ships to their destruction. There have been such wrecks in the past and surely there will be others in the future, caused by the wickedness of captains and crews, alike. For these are guilty men, whose sin is supreme ignorance of what matters most" -- Plato, Statesmen

You All Suck (Example #26 - Coincidences)

"It is no great wonder if in long process of time, while fortune takes her course hither and thither, numerous coincidences should spontaneously occur. If the number and subjects to be wrought upon be infinite, it is all the more easy for fortune, with such an abundance of material, to effect this similarity of results. Or, if on the other hand, events are limited to the combinations of some finite number, then of necessity, the same must reoccur, and in the same sequence."  -- Plutarch, Plutarch's Lives (Volume 2)

Reality ALWAYS Wins...

"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away" -- Philip K. Dick

A Majority of One: Counting Cults...

"There are some ideas so stupid only an intellectual could believe in them..." -- George Orwell.

Impotent Passive-Aggressive Crazy Rage...

"'And everybody praised the Duke
Who this great fight did win
"But what good of it came at last?"
Quoth little Peterkin
'Why that I cannot tell', said he,
'But t'was a famous victory'"

--- "After Blenheim", Robert Southey

You All Suck (Example #25 -- The New Puritans)

"Just an observation, but it is an indication of just how fucking crazy people are about sex these days that the two biggest "sex scandals" in America in the last decade -- Brett Kavanaugh and Anthony Weiner -- didn't involve any actual sex. At least Slick Willie got his Willie Slick. We're doomed." -- The Overlord

Put the Blame Where It Belongs...

I'm sorry, but it would appear that over the entire course of my lifetime it has been the Left that injected sex, or hyper-sexualized, everything within an inch of it's life and attempted to (or have succeeded) in elevating behavior and attitudes that they now -- for political purposes -- claim to abhor.

Great Moments in Dumbfuck (Supreme Court Edition)

"If you have to wallow in self-pity it's probably because no one else liked you enough to have any for you..." -- The Overlord

Judging Judges and Other Signs of Mental Breakdown...

"So God created Man in his own image...Male and Female created He them..." Book of Genesis, Chapter 1, Verse 27.

"..but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him. And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh instead thereof; and the rib, which the Lord God had taken from Man, he made a Woman and brought her unto the Man..." -- Book of Genesis, Chapter 2, Verses 20-22.

You All Suck (Example #24 -- Empire State Edition)

"Remember, it is not enough to be hit or insulted to be harmed, you must believe you are being harmed. If someone succeeds in provoking you, realize that your mind is complicit in the provocation. Which is why it is essential that we not respond impulsively to impressions; take a moment before reacting and you will find it easier to maintain control" -- Epictetus, The Art of Living"

The Double Standard Explained...

"We cannot negotiate with people who say 'what's mine is mine and what's your's is negotiable'" -- John F. Kennedy

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 9/14/18 - 9/11 "Truthers")

"The problem with Conspiracy Theorists isn't that they might be right; it is that even when they are wrong --provably, demonstrably, scientifically, conclusively, irrefutably wrong -- they still manage to BELIEVE themselves right...and sane"  -- The Overlord

Galactic Housekeeping #6

No quote today, since the first topic does not deserve one.

A Majority of One (Flags and Knees Edition)

"'My Country, right or wrong' is something no real patriot would think of saying. It is like saying 'My Mother, drunk or sober." -- G.K. Chesterton, "A Defence of Patriotism"

"To See what is in front of one's nose needs a constant struggle" -- George Orwell, "In Front of Your Nose"

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 9/1/18 - Lanny Davis)

"The first thing we do, lets kill all the lawyers." -- William Shakespeare, "Henry VI"

Great Moments in Dumbfuck: And A Little Child Shall Lead Them Edition...

"When the Overlord finally conquers the Galaxy, it shall be at the head of an army of five-year-olds; for five-year-olds are smarter than democrats and have more imagination than republicans..." -- The Overlord

You All Suck (Example #23 - Everything That's Wrong With America Edition)

"In 1948, psychologists asked over 10,000 adolescents whether they considered themselves to be a very important person. At that point, 12 percent said "Yes". The same question was asked in 2003, and this time it wasn't 12 percent who considered themselves very important, it was 80 percent." -- David Brooks

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 8/18/18 - Robert Mueller)

""Nip the shoots of arbitrary power" is the only maxim which can preserve the liberties of any people. When the people give way, their deceivers, destroyers and betrayers press upon them so fast, that there is no resisting afterwards. The encroachment upon the American constitution is such as to grow every day more and more encroaching. Like a cancer, it eats faster and faster every hour. The revenue creates pensioners and the pensioners urge for more revenue. The people grow less steady, spirited and virtuous, the seekers more numerous and more corrupt, and every day expands the circles of the dependents and expectants, until virtue, integrity, public spirit and frugality become the objects of ridicule and scorn, and vanity, luxury, foppery, selfishness, meanness and downright venality swallow up the whole society." -- John Adams "

"Presidential" This...

"When the debate is lost slander becomes the tool of the losers..." -- Socrates

A Majority of One (A Mental Health Fortnight...)

Note to Readers: The thickness of the new breed of bullshit was such as to make it necessary for your Overlord to step away from the keyboard these last two weeks just to avoid committing an act of mass murder.

We Interrupt This Blog for an Important Bulletin...

I will finish the VICIOUS (someone complained), poorly-written (someone complained) and totally ACCURATE (someone complained) and well-deserved (sez me) expose of the infantile, pot-addled mind of the Libertarian later this week. But I must pause here to address another issue of burning importance.

I'm a Libertarian...And I'm a Doofus (Part I)

"All kinds of people today call themselves “libertarians,” especially something calling itself the New Right, which consists of hippies who are anarchists instead of leftist collectivists; but anarchists are collectivists. Capitalism is the one system that requires absolute objective law, yet libertarians combine capitalism and anarchism. That’s worse than anything the New Left has proposed. It’s a mockery of philosophy and ideology. They sling slogans and try to ride on two bandwagons. They want to be hippies, but don’t want to preach collectivism because those jobs are already taken. But anarchism is a logical outgrowth of the anti-intellectual side of collectivism. I could deal with a Marxist with a greater chance of reaching some kind of understanding, and with much greater respect. Anarchists are the scum of the intellectual world of the Left, which has given them up. So the Right picks up another leftist discard. That’s the libertarian movement. " -- Ayn Rand

You've Lost Your Freakin' Minds...

"We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid." -- Benjamin Franklin

You All Suck (Example #22 - Things I've Noticed Lately)

"Every individual needs revolution, inner division, overthrow of the existing order, and renewal, but not by forcing them upon his neighbors under the hypocritical cloak of Christian love or the sense of social responsibility or any of the other beautiful euphemisms for unconscious urges to personal power.” --C.G. Jung

Great Moments in Dumbfuck (Illegal Alien Edition)

"There comes a time when it must be realized that the bulk of Humanity is just too stupid to be left alive, and it is at such moments that you desperately wish you were allowed to kill the Stupid just as soon as it self-identifies." -- The Overlord.

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 6/30/18 - Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez)

"Some apologists try to excuse Marxism by saying that it has ‘never had a chance’. This is far from the truth. Marxism and the Marxist parties have had dozens of chances. In Russia, a Marxist party took power. Within a short time it abandoned Socialism; if not in words, at any rate in the effect of its actions. In most European nations there were during the last months of the first world war and the years immediately thereafter, social crises which left a wide-open door for the Marxist parties: without exception they proved unable to take and hold power. In a large number of countries — Germany, Denmark, Norway, Sweden, Austria, England, Australia, New Zealand, Spain, France — the reformist Marxist parties have administered the governments, and have uniformly failed to introduce Socialism or make any genuine step towards Socialism... These parties have, in practice, at every historical test — and there have been many — either failed Socialism or abandoned it. This is the fact which neither the bitterest foe nor the most ardent friend of Socialism can erase. This fact does not, as some think, prove anything about the moral quality of the Socialist ideal. But it does constitute unblinkable evidence that, whatever its moral quality, Socialism is not going to come." -- James Burnham

A Majority of One ("Pat, I'd like to buy a clue..." Edition)

"Their best defense is more offensiveness." - Mark Steyn

Galactic Housekeeping #5

"Democracy; The Fools have a right to vote. Dictatorship; The Fools have a right to rule." -- Bertrand Russell

Some Safety Tips for "The Resistance".

"Hatred is the coward's revenge for being intimidated." - George Bernard Shaw

Great Moments in Dumbfuck ("But...I, like, Went to College" Edition)

"There is a cult of ignorance in the United States, and there always has been. The strain of anti-intellectualism has been a thread winding its way through our political and cultural life, nurtured by the false notion that 'my ignorance is just as good as your knowledge.'" -- Isaac Asimov

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 6/16/2018) - Robert DeNiro

"The ladder of success in Hollywood is usually a press agent, actor, director, leading man; and you are a star if you sleep with each of them in that order." -- Hedy Lamarr

You All Suck (Example #21- Congratulations! You've Raised a Skank)

Recipe for the Modern Staten Island Teenager

Ingredients:

* 1 Mated Pair of Douchebags, most likely employed by City Government
* Insufficient instruction on proper use of Birth Control
* 1 set of damaged Chromosomes (male or female, does not matter)
* 1 Public School (mis-)Education
* 1 Smartphone or iPod
* 1 Tblspn of Brain Damage
* 1 Tblspn of Fucktard
* 6 lbs of Middle-Class-With-No-Class Background

(Someone Else's) Money Doesn't Make You Virtuous...

"It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt." -- Confucius

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 6/9/2018) Bill Maher

"In intention, at any rate, the English intelligentsia are Europeanized. They take their cookery from Paris and their opinions from Moscow. In the general patriotism of the country they form a sort of island of dissident thought. England is perhaps the only great country whose intellectuals are ashamed of their own nationality. In left-wing circles it is always felt that there is something slightly disgraceful in being an Englishman and that it is a duty to snigger at every English institution, from horse racing to suet puddings. It is a strange fact, but it is unquestionably true that almost any English intellectual would feel more ashamed of standing to attention during ‘God save the King’ than of stealing from a poor box." -- George Orwell, "The Lion and The Unicorn"

The Internet of Things And You...

"When we talk about an 'Internet of Things', it's not just putting RFID tags on some dumb things so that we smart people know where that dumb thing is. It's about embedding intelligence so that things become smart and do more than they were proposed to do" -- Nicholas Negroponte, Co-Founder of the MIT Media Lab.

You All Suck (Example #20 - Evil Spock Explains All)

"He wears a mask, and his face grows to fit it." -- George Orwell, "Shooting an Elephant"

Voices Inside My Head (#12 -- The Herd of Morons)

"Opinions are like Assholes: everyone has one, they all stink, and they should rarely be heard in public." -- The Overlord

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 5/26/2018) - Stormy Daniels

“Churchill: "Madam, would you sleep with me for five million pounds?"
Socialite: "My goodness, Mr. Churchill... Well, I suppose... we would have to discuss terms, of course... "
Churchill: "Would you sleep with me for five pounds?"Socialite: "Mr. Churchill, what kind of woman do you think I am?!"
Churchill: "Madam, we've already established that. Now we are haggling about the price”   -- Winston S. Churchill

Please Excuse Our Appearance While We Renovate...

I HATE fucking change, sometimes.

Ten Indications You Might Be A Big, Stinking Drunk...

"There is no Devil; there's only God when he drinks." - Tom Waite

Just Don't Do Something...Stand There!

"Do not mistake activity for accomplishment" -- John Wooden.

I'm Begging You...

"Beggars should be entirely abolished! Truly, it is annoying to give to them, and annoying not to give to them!"` -- Friedrich Nietzsche

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 5/19/18) - Bill DeBlasio

"If a man will comprehend the richness and variety of the universe, and inspire his mind with a due measure of wonder and awe, he must contemplate the human intellect not only on it's heights of genius but in it's abysses of ineptitude." -- A.E. Housman

You All Suck (Example #19 - Animated Cabbages Edition)

"There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce..." -- Mark Twain

A Majority of One ("Get Off My Lawn!" Edition)

“The theologian may indulge the pleasing task of describing Religion as she descended from Heaven, arrayed in her native purity. A more melancholy duty is imposed on the historian. He must discover the inevitable mixture of error and corruption which she contracted in a long residence upon Earth, among a weak and degenerate race of beings.”  -- Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire

Of Rats and Sinking Ships...

"You want proof Evolution is for real; don't waste time with fossils. Just check out the New York City rat. They started out as immigrants, stowaways in some ship's cargo hold. Only the survivors got to breed, and they've been improving with every new litter. Smarter, faster, stronger. Getting ready to rule. Manhattan wouldn't be the first island they took over" -- Andrew Vacchs, "Another Life".

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 4/21/18) - Randa Jarrar

"At the core of Liberalism is the spoiled child -- miserable, as all spoiled children are, unsatisfied, demanding, ill-disciplined, despotic and useless. Liberalism is a philosophy of sniveling brats."

-P.J. O'Rourke , "Give War A Chance: Eyewitness Accounts of Mankind's Struggle Against Tyranny, Injustice, and Alcohol-free Beer"

The Virtues of Being a Dick...

"Progress is impossible without change, and those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything."- George Bernard Shaw

Modern New Yorkistan

"You approach Satan's wretched city where you behold a wide plain surrounded by iron walls. Before you are fields full of distress and torment terrible. Burning tombs are littered about the landscape. Inside these flaming sepulchers suffer the heretics, failing to believe in God and the afterlife, who make themselves audible by doleful sighs. You will join the wicked that lie here, and will be offered no respite. The three infernal Furies stained with blood, with limbs of women and hair of serpents, dwell in this circle of Hell." -- description of the City of Dis Pater, Fourth Level of Hell, Dante's Inferno

Great Moments in Dumbfuck (March For Our Lives Edition)

“This planet is largely inhabited by parrots, and it is easy to disguise folly by giving it a fine name.” A.E. Housman

Classic Lunatic #4 - A Tale of Two Kitties...

I have to do it this way, Kiddies, because otherwise Libtards don't understand. I've discovered recently that a Libtard manages to just barely grasp a simple notion if you present it graphically, and if you can include cat pictures they love it even more.

Now, I know that people are not the same as cats, but bear with me, because I have to explain a thing or two about these animals before I make my argument. Perhaps after this little explanation, the analogy will start to make sense. The cat on the Left is a pampered housecat. The one on the Right  (below) is a feral cat, and yes, my use of Left and Right does have a specific point, and that will become crystal clear as I get to the end of this little screed.

The pictures of the two felines are a metaphor for American Life:

Fluffy, the Cat pictured above, is analogous to today's modern Liberal. She lives entirely by the efforts of others; someone feeds her, she doesn't pay for the food, and all she has to do is probably kick up a fuss, and some dipshit with little native intelligence will bring her a bowl of food and some water, and perhaps the occasional saucer of milk. That's primarily why she's such a fat little fucking bastard.

You All Suck (Exhibit #18 - The Collective in the Age of Narcissism)

“I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said.”  - William F. Buckley

Voices Inside My Head (#11 Ban Public Schools, Not Guns)

"Never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity" --- Hanlon's Razor

A Majority of One (Cesspool of Consciousness Edition)

"When a great genius appears in the world, you may know him by this sign: that the dunces are all in confederacy against him." - Jonathan Swift, Abolishing Christianity and Other Essays.

Get Off the Road!

There is nothing quite as frightening as the thought that human beings have been put in control of rolling contraptions of mechanical death...

You All Suck (Exhibit #17 -- There's Never a Gun Around When You Need One)

The Modern Human Being is a walking advertisement for both birth control and retroactive late term abortion...

It Sucks Being Sick...

Mrs. Overlord is still on the mend, hospitalized with pneumonia, but is slowly getting better. In the meantime, I have gotten ill...

Stuff in a Hospital...

Mrs. Overlord has contracted pneumonia. Already a dangerous condition, it is even worse for someone who has a respiratory system compromised by muscular dystrophy. Thanks to the good people at New York Presbyterian Hospital (the most awesomest hospital in the Solar System) she is expected to make a full recovery. We thank you for your good thoughts and expressions of support.

Flotsam and Jetsam...

Mrs. Overlord is sick, again, and time is a problem. I will finish the trilogy of Christian tomfoolery I've started later this week, but so that you don't suffer Overlord Withdrawal symptoms, here's some stuff to think about from the last week...

We're NOT A "Christian" Country, Part Two...

"Because religious belief, or non-belief, is such an important part of every person's life, freedom of religion affects every individual. Religious institutions that use government power in support of themselves and force their views on persons of other faiths, or of no faith, undermine all our civil rights. Moreover, state support of an established religion tends to make the clergy unresponsive to their own people, and leads to corruption within religion itself. Erecting the "wall of separation between church and state," therefore, is absolutely essential in a free society." -- Thomas Jefferson

We're NOT A "Christian" Country, Part One...

“All national institutions of churches, whether Jewish, Christian, or Turkish, appear to me no other than human inventions, set up to terrify and enslave mankind, and monopolize power and profit."  -- Thomas Paine