Tuesday, July 6, 2021

You All Suck (#47 - Post-Independence Day Rant)

 Apologies for an extended absence. There has been much to do around the new Death Star in the last two weeks -- much of it to do with an annoying building superintendent who believes his lowly station grants him dictatorial powers and an HOA consisting mostly of brain-damaged monkeys with severe ADHD, a consequence of being Baby Boomers. I have fought the good fight, and won most of the battles, over petty regulations which exist in contradiction of the premise that "Hey, I pay to live here. Fuck off and mind your own business".

Friday, June 25, 2021

CRT, Cancer, Snowflakes and Horny Squirrels...

 


"Ours may be the first civilization destroyed, not by the power of our enemies, but by the ignorance of our teachers and the dangerous nonsense they are teaching our children. In an age of Artificial Intelligence, they are creating Artificial Stupidity..." -- Thomas Sowell

Friday, June 4, 2021

Douchebag of the Week (Week Ending 6/5/2021 - YouTube Dating Advice Chick)

 Author's Note: Blogging has been slow recently due to the need to relocate to a new Death Star. We should be finished moving next week, so I can't promise anything will be written in the next 7-10 days. In addition, I'm a bit under the weather -- I've discovered a growth at the back of my throat, which at present has doctors fairly certain ISN'T cancer, but no guarantees. Hopefully, all the test results come back negative and they can get their collective heads out of their asses and fix it soon.

If I'm incommunicado after this, now you know why.

Thursday, May 20, 2021

Defunding (Our Own) Terrorists...

 


"The object of terrorism is terrorism. The object of oppression is oppression. The object of torture is torture. The object of murder is murder. The object of power is power. Now do you begin to understand me?" -- George Orwell, "1984"

Friday, April 30, 2021

Joe Biden: The Interview...

 Imagine, if you will, your Overlord dudded out in his best suit; jackboots shined to mirror-like perfection, polished helmet glistening in the midday sun, long black cloak immaculately turned out. He arrives at the White House to speak to Darth Bidiot, the Sith Lord of Confusion...

Tuesday, April 27, 2021

Your Government At Work...

 


"The Government" is an amorphous blob of about 5 or 6 hundred faces that are the visible pustule that signifies the presence of the underlying disease, and literally millions of nameless, faceless, anonymous, nose-picking morons who only have a job because they managed to pass a watered-down civil service exam with a 62." -- The Overlord.

Sunday, April 25, 2021

Authenticity?


The political left has a strange relationship with the word "Authenticity".

Generally speaking, when a Leftist refers to something as being "inauthentic" what they really mean is "This is the Real McCoy, however, admitting so makes me look stupid, so we'll just pretend otherwise".

Friday, April 23, 2021

You All Suck (# 45-- You First, Comrade...)

 "The problem with the unhinged leftist (is there any other kind?) is that he's always very keen to force others to do the things he wants them to do, but which he would never himself do in a million years...." -- The Overlord

Sunday, April 18, 2021

Customer Non-Service #2...

 "Even your most-loyal customers always have a choice of where to take their business..." -- Marilyn Suttle, "Who's Your Gladys: How to Turn Even the Most Difficult Customer into Your Biggest Fan"

Thursday, April 15, 2021

Four Observations and A Diagnosis...

 Been busy packing up the Death Star and searching out more worlds ripe for conquest. Apologies for the interruption in the supply of snark this past week and for having no quote today.

Monday, April 5, 2021

The Blasted Heath...

 No quote today because even the wisest men of antiquity could never have conceived of this sort of clusterfuck...

Thursday, April 1, 2021

Explaining Censorship to A Blithering Idiot...

 "Democracy and Socialism have nothing in common but one word, Equality. But notice the difference: while Democracy seeks Equality in Liberty, Socialism seeks Equality in restraint and servitude..." -- Alexis de Tocqueville.

Saturday, March 27, 2021

What Fresh Devilry Is This?

 


"The illiterate of the future will not be the person who cannot read. It will be the person who does not know how to learn." -- Alvin Toffler

Thursday, March 25, 2021

But...But...Muh Narrative!

 Author's Note: Before I begin, I want to thank a bunch of folks for a very good week, traffic wise. The list may be short, but appears very distinguished, indeed...

Wednesday, March 24, 2021

A COVID Conversation I'd Like To Have...

Karen: Have you gotten your COVID shot yet?

Me: No, but I identify as a vaccinated person.

Karen: What does that mean?

Me: It means I am a vaccinated person trapped inside an unvaccinated body.

Karen: That doesn't make sense!

Me: Don't you deny my truth! That's oppression! This space is supposed to be free of vaccine-ism.

Karen: But that's crazy...There's no such thing as vaccine-ism.

Me: Yes there is. That attitude of yours is a manifestation of Vaccine Supremacy, in fact.

Karen: What do you mean?

Me: Please stop calling me "You". Please use my preferred pronoun.

Karen: What's that?

Me: I prefer to be called "Vaccinaro" or "Vaccinari". Unless I'm also identifying as female that day, in which case the acceptable pronouns are "Vaccinara" and "Vaccinaria". You are also required, because "safety" and "diversity", to suspend your version of objective reality to accept my subjective version. Otherwise, you're my enemy.

Karen: Those aren't even real words! How can I ignore reality?

Me: Where do you work?

Karen: Why do you want to know?

Me: Because you're not validating my lived experience and refusing to use my stated, preferred pronouns. This gives me the right to call your boss and have you fired, and if I can get three people on Twitter to agree with me that's the beginning of a lawsuit. I'll ruin you, you Science Denier!

Karen: What Science?

Me: The Science that says I can be a Vaccinaro trapped inside a Non-Vaccinaro body. We Vaccinaro are a hated and oppressed minority, having to share the world with you filthy, elitist, colonialist Vaccinated. If I get 10 more likes on my Instagram and enough Chinese grant money the medical profession will put a page in the DSM-V just for us and the government will have to give us all sorts of benefits you oppressive Vaccinated can't have because Equity.

Karen: That has nothing to do with Science. Or Vaccinations.

Me: You're dangerously close to me gathering the other Vaccinari together to have a peaceful protest with bricks and Molotovs on your front lawn, Karen.

Karen: I'll just call the cops.

Me: You can't...you had them defunded.

Karen: All I asked is if you're vaccinated! Do we really have to have this argument?

Me: The question was offensive.

Karen: How was it offensive?

Me: See? You don't even know! Unconscious bias, that is! I swear I...just...can't...even...

Karen: I didn't mean to offend you. All I did was ask a question.

Me: You have no right to question me! I'm an oppressed minority. What's next? You going to gun me down in the street?

Karen: I wouldn't do that! I hate guns.

Me: So, you're a Gun-o-phobe, too? I love guns, so if you hate them then you must have a mental disorder called a "phobia". Everyone knows that. Anything I like that you hate indicates you're insane and a hater. Don't yuck my yum, Fash.

Karen: Fash?

Me: Fascist.

Karen; I just wanted to know if it was safe to be around you...erm...I mean Vaccinaro...I don't want to get sick.

Me: Oh, so only people who haven't had the shot can spread COVID? We're all diseased, is that what you're saying? Your biases are showing! You're a bigot! You FASCIST!

Karen: I am NOT a Fascist! 

Me: Yes you are! You said only Vaccinari can give you COVID. You can catch it off a lamppost or a public toilet seat, you know.

Karen: No you can't!

Me: Yes you can! Dr. Fauci said so on MSNBC and he and they always tell the truth. Until either of them changes their minds without warning in which case whatever they say today that contradicts whatever they said yesterday is now the truth, and again, you are obliged to believe it because shut up.

Karen: I will not shut up. I have the right of Free Speech.

Me: I have unilaterally declared that your words are violence, Hate Speech, in fact, therefore,  I have also unilaterally decided you cannot have Free Speech. Only oppressed Vaccinari can have Free Speech, because of the Legacy of COVID.

Karen: You're out of your mind; do you know that?

Me: Now you know how it feels, Snowflake.

Sunday, March 21, 2021

The Rise of Jim Slow...

 


"I have a dream that one day little black boys and girls will be holding hands with little white boys and girls..." -
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr "I Have a Dream" speech
.


Wednesday, March 17, 2021

Obligatory St. Patrick's Day Shitpost...

 "Hibernia (Ireland) is not worth the trouble of conquest...for it contains naught but whores, drunkards and thieves, and Rome has enough of these already..." -- Unknown Roman Senator

Monday, March 8, 2021

Friday, March 5, 2021

COVID Incompetence...

 "According to Mark 11:12-13, God's messengers were not the only  ones who were incompetent. 'He [Jesus] was hungry. And on seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to see if he could find anything on it. When he came to it, he found nothing but leaves, for it was not the season for figs'.

Imagine Jesus, the divine, holy, wisest of the wise not knowing that figs were out of season. Now allegedly Jesus could have performed a miracle and made figs magically appear, but preferred sour grapes, instead: Then he said to the tree 'May no one ever eat fruit from you again' (Mark 11:14)." ---
G.M. Jackson, "The Jesus Delusion"

Monday, March 1, 2021

You All Suck (#44 - Of Barking Dogs and Dog Whistles)

 Q; Why does your dog bark so much?

A: Because he can't speak English.

Cuomo Watch #2 ...

 "Hubris is one of the great renewable resources..." -- P.J. O'Rourke

"If one sins against the laws of proportion and gives something too big to something too small to carry it -- too big sails to too small a ship, too big meals to too small a body, too big powers to too small a soul -- the result is bound to be a complete upset. In an outburst of hubris the overfed body will rush into sickness, while the jack-in-office will rush into the unrighteousness that hubris always brings..." -- Plato

Thursday, February 11, 2021

Of Nests and Pests...

 Please forgive the lateness of this post, for the Overlord had 'puter problems -- both keyboard and monitor gave up the ghost, simultaneously -- and my attempts at bodging together older components, and the blatant lies told by UPS concerning the definition of "two-day delivery", kept me from my regularly-scheduled duties. Sometimes, even the Dark Side cannot overcome the power of What Brown Can Do For To You. In the meantime, I also have to deal with this)

Sunday, January 31, 2021

No More Cuomo...

 

"If you do not take an interest in the affairs of your government, then you are doomed to live under the rule of fools..." -- Plato

Thursday, January 28, 2021

Waste for Show...

 "In a society dominated by the fact of commercial competition, money is necessarily the test of competition and wastefulness the sole criterion of power..." -- Upton Sinclair

Saturday, January 23, 2021

Fixing 'Murica, Part Two: Salvage and Recovery

 "The people who scream the loudest and most-frequently about racism, are, in fact, the real racists they are warning you about..." -- The Overlord

Tuesday, January 19, 2021

Thursday, January 14, 2021

The Left is Just a Bunch of Jilted Booty Calls...

 On the subject of impeaching a President when he's already set to exit the scene in a week:

This all reminds me of the end of a very messy love affair.
From the male perspective: You have invested time, effort, energy and some emotion into a losing effort. It is now over, however, and there is not much productive left to do but to say your goodbyes and then go on with your life.
From the female perspective: simply limiting your losses and then moving on is not satisfying. This deprives you of the three elements that differentiate you from the male: the need for drama, the need to portray yourself to the outside world as his victim, and the need to not only get in the last word, but to ensure that your last words are of such a nature as to emotionally scar the bastard who is the source of your unhappiness.
Your own role in this fiasco, of course, goes unnoticed and unremarked upon.
This impeachment is the equivalent of saying "and by the way, you have a small dick and I faked every orgasm" before dramatically slamming the door in his face.
The fact that he's on the other side of the door laughing at you, and already planning to screw your sister, doesn't matter: you got that last act of passive-aggressive defiance out and now you can make yourself fat and even-more unattractive with tons of Haagen-Dasz, free of guilt. The Left cannot be happy with mere victory: it must crush and humiliate it's enemies, as well. We can now look forward to four years of Struggle Sessions and something akin to Mao's war on the Four Olds. Be careful what you ask for...

Saturday, January 9, 2021

You All Suck (#43 - You Dumb Fu*king Monkeys Edition)

 "If you had a million Shakespeares, could they write like a monkey?" -- Steven Wright

"Monkeys are superior to men in this: when a monkey looks in a mirror, he sees a monkey." -- Malcolm de Chazal

Tuesday, January 5, 2021

Notes from the COVID Gulag...

"For, having begun their building of the Tower of Babel without us, they will end in anthropophagy. And it is then that the beast will come crawling to us and lick our feet, and spatter them with tears of blood from it's eyes. And we shall sit upon the beast and raise the cup. And on it will be written "Mystery!"." -- Fyodor Dostoyesvsky, "The Brothers Karamazov"