You All Suck (Example #29, Holiday Edition)

"Censorship is telling a man he cannot have a steak just because a baby can't chew it." -- Mark Twain

The Year-End Review...

"This is dedicated to the thousands of brave and loyal Stormtroopers who gave their lives in the defense of the galaxy against the pernicious poison of stupidity. We must persevere and remember: in The Great Galactic War Against Retard, there will, unfortunately, be casualties. I just wish someone would finally design a Death Star that doesn't have the same fucking weakness. I mean, COME ON. It's not like this is complicated, guys. You've had like fifty examples, already. Even the Chinese Overlord  figured it out and his Minions are building Death Stars with no exhaust ports, and out of something better than plastic. For lower wages, too. And why can't our vehicles have wheels? Why legs, Dumbass?" -- The Overlord.

When Reality Ends and Fiction Begins...

"Life is infinitely stranger than anything which the mind of Man could invent. We would not dare to conceive the things which are mere commonplaces of existence. If we could fly out that window, hand in hand, hover over this great city, gently remove the roofs, and peep in on the queer things that are going on, the strange coincidences, the plannings, the cross-purposes, the wonderful chains of events, working through generations, and leading to the most outre results, it would make all fiction with it's conventionalities and foreseen conclusions most stale and unprofitable." -- Arthur Conan Doyle

Another Day, Another Idiot...

"I'm in a business where no one cares about anything except how well your last collection sold." - Calvin Klein

Making Spirits Bright...

"Christmas is a necessity. There has to be at least one day of the year to remind us that we're here for something else besides ourselves." -- Eric Severeid

A Majority Of One: "Be Careful What You Ask For...".

"The safest road to Hell is the gradual one - the gentle slope, soft underfoot, without sudden turnings, without milestones, without signposts." -- C.S. Lewis